And In health.

Have you ever taken a bottle of water or soda out of the freezer and it looked like it was still liquid, and the second you start shaking it, it freezes up into solid ice. It's like all it needed was a reassortment of it's particles so it could be what it's meant to be. It needed to be held, and moved. And poof, it's solid ice. That could be one of those things that fascinates me every single time I witness. And every time it happens it gets me thinking about what it means.

My family is expecting new additions to the family. My sister is 8 months pregnant and according to her doctor, she could be in labor any minute now. Inshaa'allah, very soon this house will be filled with diapers and baby food and well.. A little baby boy. My mother was talking to me about her parents yesterday, and out of nowhere she said that she is hoping to god that she would get to see my children. The thing is, my brother and sister are 7 and 10 years older than me, respectively. And my sister got married at the age of 26 and my brother got married at the age of 24. I'm Eighteen. I don't see marriage in my near future at all.

It scares me senseless. How many people are lucky enough to get married and spend the rest of their lives with another human being without changing their mind about them. How could someone just stand there and vow to commit to this one person until death seperates them. And the way I see it,  it's so much easier to love some one when they aren't close to you. People stand there and they say "I promise to love and cherish you, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part". It's said like even though things will get rough, they will still keep their promise. But it's so much easier to love someone when things get worse, when there's a financial crisis, when they're sick, and finally when they're dead. It's so much easier to love and care for someone who is wounded.
Am I the only girl on the face of the planet that's thinking like this?

 It's the "& In Health" part that really worries me.

The silliest things worry me about commitment. I don't imagine a situation when I'd ever hand over the television remote to someone else. I can't even begin to imagine why I would ever get used to the taste of olives because someone else likes them. I know that even if I pick out the olives from my plate, I will still taste olives. And I don't want to taste olives.

But my mother wants to live to see me in a wedding dress, and she wants to hold my children.

So, now what?