The Shade of Green You Never Saw

I am okay with whatever I have right now. The thing is, I don't know what I have. I really don't know what I have right now to keep me going.
there are few things I am certain about, and most of my certainty is about my uncertainty.

I know that I can write. I know that I can not describe an object, or a sight, but I can describe the feelings it gives me, or anyone.
I know that I have thoughts that are different from others around me, but I also know that the moment I try to express them, my heart rate will sprint out of control.
I know that I stutter most of the time.
I know that I write "your welcome" even though I know it's actually "you're welcome".
I know that reconnecting with a certain person could've been enough to shake me to my core, but it didn't.
I know that I laugh a lot, because it's easier, and because I can't control it.
I know that I am a Muslim, but I also know that I know less about Islam than I know about anything else.
I know that I believe in this country, and the people of this country.
I know that I can say " I know I can say" and I don't have to say "that". I also know that I like using the word that.
I know that my last statement could be very confusing.
I know that my spelling has improved drastically in the past three years.
I know that when I was a child, I wanted to paint. I wanted to paint because I wanted to move people.
I know that I cannot paint.
I know that I've always loved food. I also know that I love food more than I should.
I know that my hands shake in interviews. I know I let them shake.
I know I can sing. I also know I don't have control over my own voice.
I know I rarely ever know what I'm doing.
I know I can turn most situations to my favor at the end of the day.
I know some people scare me.
I know I rarely meet deadlines. And I always know if I will, or not.
I know I don't like to remember certain years of my life, but I have no regrets.
I know I'm the loudest screamer in any amusement park.
I know that if I died today, and everyone found out everything I ever hid from the world, most people will hate me.
I know I'm all you have sometimes.
And I know sometimes, most of the time, you are all I have.
And finally, I know I talk to myself like I'm a stranger, because that's really what I am.

And I'm okay with all I have.. for now.